Anyone who's even had a passing interest in spicy foods has done it. They order the extra hot wings to impress a friend and can't handle it or they've eaten chain-restaurant spicy so many times that they don't think twice when they go for something hot at an authentic spot and ruin their night. It's a tale as old as the Rapture Sauce forgotten in the back of your fridge: going way too hot, way too quickly, and getting steamrolled by it.
But how do those spicy guys and gals do it? Why is it that when you get real, honest-to-god, HOT entrees, you spend the rest of night dumping lava into the toilet? Is there a way to fully enjoy truly molten food?? The answer is a resounding "probably!"
All joking aside, it's easier than you think to eat really hot things and simply requires knowledge of what you are about to consume, patience, and perseverance (with a couple other things that are completely out of your hands). If you truly want to be your town's fire eater, keep reading.
Know Your Dish
How hot is "hot?" That depends. Are you getting hot wings at TGI Fridays? You'll probably be fine. Have you begged the waiter for "Thai-Hot" curry at a Thai restaurant run by Thai people and they delivered? You may die.
You have to know where you are and have a little common sense here, people! If you are ordering a Ghost Pepper Burger from a national chain, it's not going to be on the same level as the Ghost Pepper Burger from a local bar with a one-eyed chef who personally hands you a T-shirt for finishing it. This usually comes down to having your wits about you and paying attention. Usually, it only takes messing this up once to figure out.
Usually, it only takes messing this up once to figure out.
Oh, and don't ever be the jerk who asks for something "as hot as you can make it" and then refuses to pay when your dumb-ass can't eat it. That's a real POS move.
Start Low and Build Slow
Like anything you want to do well, you have to walk before you can run. You think Buzz Aldrin spent a decade eating chips on the couch and then one day hopped on a rocket to the moon? I mean, maybe you do, schooling has gotten pretty shoddy as of late... Anyway, NO, he didn't! He started with the basics and learned and trained and learned and trained and finally had what it took to walk on the moon.
Start with mild stuff and let your body acclimate.
Now, we know you aren't bounding across space, but the same approach still applies. Start with mild stuff and let your body acclimate. Our Cranberry Jalapeno, Tingly Sauce, and Danny Wood's Jalapeno Cilantro are great places to start. Once you are comfortable move up to something like Tarnation or Garlic Habanero. Heck, we have all our sauces numbered so you can feel safe going number by number. The real trick is to keep going while keeping the steps up small. You got this!
Don't Take Breaks
The funny thing about heat tolerance is that, while it takes some time to get it, it takes virtually no time at all to lose it. Those who eat the hottest stuff do it for two reasons:
- They REALLY love it.
- They are getting paid.
Because you simply can't do it every now and then and expect things to stay the same. For whatever reason, your body tends to "forget" that you like ultra-hot things pretty fast and if you aren't giving yourself a good dose of fire a few times a month (at the very least), you are going to drift back down to being a puddle of tears and cramps in no time. After all the work you've put in, why would you do that to yourself?
Other Factors
Of course there are things outside your control that we've experienced (some firsthand) that can defy your valiant efforts to become a spice lord.
Everyone has organs and sometimes those organs decide they are going to stop working well/at all, requiring you to change your lifestyle. Really spicy foods can often be one of the first things you have to relinquish just for comfort-sake, if nothing else.
Don't worry, though, we are sure you'll still be really cool when you are 80.
Everyone also gets older and your system tends to get a bit touchy as you age. A lot of people find their guts give them a real problem with spicy foods the older they are, which can take all the fun out of it. Plus, with the wisdom that comes with age, many don't feel the need to impress or push themselves in that way any longer. Don't worry, though, we are sure you'll still be really cool when you are 80. Er, hot, we mean...
Get Spicy with TorchBearer
So there's your quick lesson on getting yourself into spicier things and not destroying your body or embarrassing yourself in the process.
Start low and slow with our humble mild options and build up until you can handle the screamin' punch-you-in-your-mouth varieties, like our As Seen on Hot Ones Collection (as pictured above). Now get out there and get started. Remember, once you get spicy, stay spicy!
